The Burn
by ThePendragonQueen
Summary: It's a cold, lonely night on the Argo II and Leo is left in the engine room to deal with his feelings and sort things out. Songfic. Oneshot.


**Hey. This is a songfic. It's my first one too so sorry if it kinda sucks, trying figure out how this works. The song is called The Burn. Please review and favorite(if you want). Mostly review though! Let me know how you think this is. There is also a video on Youtube for this song . Heroes of Olympus- Leo Valdez- The Burn. (I made it. It inspired me to try this songfic.)**

 **FYI: This takes place sometime while still on the Argo II.**

 **Disclaimer: I do not own the song The Burn. All rights go to Matchbox Twenty. I also do not own Percy Jackson. Rick Riordan does sadly.**

* * *

 **Leo's POV:**

I sat in the Engine Room of the Argo II by myself. Nothing new really. I usually sat in here by myself anyways. And if I wasn't in here, I was out steering the ship- by myself. I never seem to really have anybody to hang out with, not like everyone else did. Percy had Annabeth, Piper had Jason, Hazel had Frank. Me? I had nobody. Well, unless you counted Festus but he's not really a some _body_ he's more like a some _thing_. Didn't make him any less though. He still treated me better than pretty much everyone on this ship.

All anybody ever really needed me for was to build and fix things. Something was broken? Leo, fix it. Something wasn't working correctly? Leo, fix it. Something was destroyed by a fire breathing, demigod eating monster? Leo, fix it. They never actually talked to me to just _talk to me_. If they ever talked to me it was something about the ship or battle strategies, never a normal conversation.

I'm not even sure they realized they were ignoring me. They probably thought that they were best buds with me and we always talked. Actually, scratch that, they probably didn't even realize I was on the ship half the time. I used to try and talk to them but my attempts were futile so I just gave up.

I laid back on the floor and started fiddling with some parts. Maybe I should just leave. I doubt they would notice that I was gone. I could just walk away, run away again for the seventh time. Start a new life. It would be easy. I tried to sit up but my body would't let me. It was too tired, too drained of energy.

 _I thought about leaving but I couldn't even get outta bed._

Another problem I realized was that I had no way out. We were up in the sky at the moment and I wasn't Jason, I couldn't just fly away. I used to be able to just hop on Festus and I'd be gone but now he was just a head attached to this ship. I wish I had him back again. The whole him.

 _I'm hanging' cause I couldn't get a ride outta town._

As much as I hated how they never talked to me, I was glad no one was around to see me like this. They would think I'm weak. They would never look at me the same way again. They would pity me. Or maybe it would be good if they saw me like this. They always complained I never took anything seriously. They said I joked too much, I was too happy and energetic, how ironic right now. Percy would be happy to see me like this. He yelled at me a couple days (weeks?) ago for blowing up Camp Jupiter even though it wasn't my fault. He wanted me to feel bad. Well, he got what he wanted. I'm sure Frank would enjoy this scene too. He's never really cared much for me.

 _Now anyone who really wanted me to be down, come 'round._

I sat there and played with some springs. This whole situation reminded me of that song. The one that goes... Oh, how does it go? 'Maybe if I fall asleep I won't breathe right' Yeah, what comes after that? Uhh... 'Can nobody hear me? I got a lot... I got a lot...' I got a lot what? I can't remember. Oh come on, Valdez, think. Ugh, now I can't even remember the tune.

 _Thought about singin' but I couldn't remember all of the words._

Oh, forget the song. Just build. I played with more parts. I brought some gears out of my tool belt and put them together. Put this one here, and this one here... No wait, that's wrong! Damnit! I pulled on the parts trying to get them off but they were stuck. I pulled with all my might, why wasn't this working? The pieces refused to come apart. Sounds like me. I feel sad, I feel depressed, but I couldn't fully fall apart. It was like something inside of me was forcing me to keep everything together.

 _Breakin' but I couldn't get the pieces apart._

I heard a nock on the door. "Leo? You in there?" It was Jason.

I quickly stood up and plastered a smile on my face. I walked over and opened up the door. "Hey, Sparky. What's up?"

Jason glared at me for the nickname. "It's time for dinner. Just wondering if you wanted any."

"Nah, not right now. I really need to finish fixing something. I'll get some later," I smiled reassuringly.

"Alright," Jason said shrugging, "Just make sure you eat, wouldn't want you passing out on the job." Jason laughed. I didn't understand what was funny but I laughed too.

 _Laughin' never knowing what the joke was about._

"Bye, Blondie!" I shouted as he walked away. I closed the door and my face fell. I shrunk to to the floor and pulled my knees up to my chest.

 _Now I'm down._

I pulled my hand up and lit my fingertips aflame. I watched as the flames stood burning bright and destructive. Why was I the one who had to be born with fire? Why me? Fire was destructive. It caused harm and pain to everyone who touched it. Everyone but me.

 _And I wonder how I never got the burn._

I watched the flame on my finger. I felt like I needed a Wiki How page on How To Be Happy. Maybe I could make it. I could call it How To Be Festus. I chuckled. That was a bad joke. I wondered if Festus was happy. He was stuck to a ship, immobile. How could he be happy? Despite him being unable to be independent, he always seemed happy. Just being around him made me happy.

 _And if I'm ever gonna learn_ _how lonely people make a life one strain at a time._

I willed the flames to move down my fingers and to my palm. I thought about the flames that destroyed my mom's shop and killed her. It was my fault. I closed my eyes and thought of her face. It was fuzzy. It had been so long ago now. It was becoming a struggle just to remember her. Everyday my memory of her seemed to be slowly fading away. I wish I could remember better. I wish she was here with me right now.

 _Forgot about everything and everyone I needed before._

I needed something to make me happy again. Truly happy. My mom was gone, Festus was nothing but a mast, I was headed on a dangerous quest to save the world and I was sure to die. Let's make a list of all the positive things in my life.

1\. I'm still alive (for now)

2\. I still have fetus (even if there's not much of him left)

3\. I had friends (I guess. If you could even call them friends)

4\. I can build stuff fairly well (Although, I couldn't even make a small machine earlier)

I tried to think of other things but my list seemed to have come to a halt. There really wasn't anything else great in my life right now.

 _Tryin' to get a handle on a reason to shine._

Maybe I could try to fix the things that were bad. There was my mom, no fixing that. There was Festus, maybe I could start to rebuild his body again. There was the lack of friendship and trust, I could try to talk to everyone more, about things other than the quest. Maybe they would start to warm up to me. Maybe they would come to talk to me about actual stuff. Maybe I could finally fully trust someone.

 _Pickin' up the pieces that are falling behind. Takes time._

I watched the flame dance across my palm. I looked at my palm closely. I watched the skin after the fire ran over it. No scorch marks, no burns, nothing. Why don't I burn?

 _So I wonder how I never got the burn._

I just want to be happy. How does everyone else do it? I'm sure Percy is upset. I'm sure he holds a lot of lives over his head. I know he comes from a crazy back story, Annabeth too. So how do they do it? How are they always still so happy and optimistic all the time? So sure that everything is going to turn out fine. How do they keep pushing forward? Then it hit me. They have each other.

 _And if I'm ever gonna learn how lonely people make a life one strain at a time._

Mi mama. I wanted mi mama. I wished I could undo what happened that night. I remembered the firefighter picking me up. I remember them sitting me down in the truck and looking to see if I was injured. They asked me if anything hurt. They asked me what my name was. I just cried. I cried for mi mama. I cried because she was burnt from the fire and I wasn't, not physically at least. Why wasn't I dead? Why did she have to be dead? It wasn't fair.

 _And I wonder how I never got the burn._

Would I still be happy if she hadn't died? Yes. For sure. Was she happy when she was still alive? She only had me. Aunt Rosa never cared much for me or her. My dad had left her. She was stuck working day and night to put food on the table. The only person we had was each other. Was she happy?

 _And if I'm ever gonna learn how lonely people make their life one strain at a time._

She was happy. And so was I. Because together we thought we could rule the world. Sure money was tight and there wasn't always the best food on the table- if any. But we still had each other. And nothing made us happier than spending time together.

 _And still shine._


End file.
